Just look at the picture of this guy and what is the first word that comes to mind? I am sure you could come up with a few for example “Stupidity, No hockey sense, disgrace, embarrassment to the league, ugly, worthless, cheap, waste of money, etc”
Matt Cooke, aka in the Pittsburgh Penguins’ locker room, Matt Cookie. Not such a tough name for such a “tough” agitator. Makes you wonder what they mean by, “cookie”?
This stupid pucker has repeatedly thrown his body around the ice, and his fists in the dirtiest way and I think I finally figured out why.
He’s a transvestite.
Ok, maybe it’s just that he simply cannot play the game of hockey what so ever. Take a look at the star agitators in the NHL and who do you come up with? To name a couple, Sean Avery and Daniel Carcillo. Do you ever see these tough puckers ever doing half of what Cookie does?
That is not a rhetorical question. The answer is NO!
Avery and Carcillo actually know how to play the game of hockey, it may not be much, but they do have some hockey sense, for what they are worth. They skate hard for being pucked-up agitators, and they are always looking to make plays. Sure they agitate and drop their pants gloves when needed, but you hardly ever see them doing half of what Cookie does.
By the way, Cookie? I want to know how the Penguins came up with this name for him. Maybe he munches on his mommy’s “cookies” when he is serving suspensions all season long. Yuck, ok, that sounds gross.
Last season Matt Cooke ( I refuse to call him Cookie any longer, just sounds puckin’ stupid, then again, that’s what we all think of when we see a picture of him, right? Ok, yes, I will continue to call him Cookie.) He delivered one of the dirtiest pucking hits to Marc Savard of the Boston Bruins and did not receive one game suspension! Not one single pucking game!
Cookie must of offered some very good chocolate chips (umm, that sounds yucky too) to Lemiuex to go cry to Bettman. Anyways, a year later Savard is still suffering concussion like symptoms and his career is in jeopardy, and may never return to the NHL. Now, as you know, Savard is no chump, he is a skilled and very talented forward who gets respect around the league.
I guess Cookie was jealous and wanted to end it for Savard.
Now, just last week, Cookie delivered yet another pucking dirty hit to Fedor Tyutin of the Columbus Blue Jackets. Thankfully Tyutin was able to get up and was not injured. It was a routine play in the corner, Tyutin had his back turned, and out of no where here comes Cookie throwing his body right into Tyutin’s back, deliberately trying to hurt another skilled hockey player.
Cookie was suspended for 4 games. FOUR GAMES!? That is it!? This guy is a pucking repeat offender and he only gets FOUR PUCKING GAMES!? Who does he have to be pucking to get that kid of royal treatment? Just saying…
Now we could go on and on all day long about this pucker who is an embarassment to the NHL, but we refuse to waste any more time on this disgraceful loser. He does not deserve to play in the NHL and hopefully one day when the Penguins open their eyes and realize this, they will waive him (though ti is hard for a penguin to wave with those weird wings they have), because I am almost positive no other team would ever think of picking him up. Unless of course they want to puck their fans.
If the NHL is going to continue to turn a blind eye on Matt Cooke, they’re putting other player’s livelihoods in jeopardy. Cookie has zero respect for his opposition and in a violent sport like hockey where mutual respect is a must, he’s a ticking time bomb waiting to explode. And, this is why he is our Dirtiest Mother Pucker in the NHL. That and we have reason to believe he really has pucked his mother.
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